I will save you any unnecessary time and warn you upfront in case you've inadvertently stumbled in here expecting the wrong thing. This will not be pretty.
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Yes, its Valentine's Day! In our culture, that means an entire day of our social media feeds filled with the two sides of love. On one side are those who will take the opportunity to express their affections for their Valentine, and in America show off the gifts that they've purchased and received. On the other side are those without a Valentine who will either take to social media to bemoan the day and remind the world to be sensitive to their plight or, celebrate their freedom and laugh at those trapped in the bonds of commitment and fidelity. Then, I hope, there is this post.
I have historically taken advantage of this day to celebrate my Valentine and the gift that she is to me. I have also historically done so in a humorous way. I am convinced that St. Valentine was actually the Saint of overpriced greeting cards and heart-shaped antacids despite what history has lead us to believe. So I have jokingly but sweetly given homage to my beloved in various ways. My Facebook friends may recall an entire day of "Random Facts About Ashleigh". Every hour I would post a random fact about my sweetheart to her horror and the enjoyment of my friends. Then there was the year I found the Song of Solomon Valentine's Day Cards and shared them all on her Facebook wall. Classic.
Without a doubt, my favorite method of Valentine's Day affection has been my custom images and V-Day Cards that I would make for Ashleigh. Even she has loved and appreciated them over the years. Here are a few examples of my work in the past.
It really is adorable.
#Goals
(Sigh) What are you gonna do? Right?
Seriously. I would. She won't let me. I've tried. But for the record. Totally would.
People say I am funny. But I only care what she says about my jokes, honestly.
Take note gentlemen. This is as good as it gets.
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This morning I finished my devotions and was waiting on my computer to load up and spent just a couple of minutes on Facebook admiring all the love that was going around this morning. Ashleigh and I were laughing as we prepared for the day about these very pictures and remembering my past romantic gestures. Every day with her is a gift of grace but recently I am keenly aware of this reality more than ever. So for this special day, I thought I would do another custom Valentine's Day but with a slightly different message.
There is something I have to say upfront because if no one else reads this I know my wife will. She will see this picture and have an immediate reaction. I can't say for sure the order of the reactions but they will all certainly come. One will be of how she thinks she looks and wonder why I chose this picture. She will understand that soon. She will see our kids and have that "Mom" moment and wonder what happened to our babies. Then at some point, she will feel what I know she was feeling when the picture was taken and what I know she has felt many times in our relationship.
This picture was taken in 2009 and at that moment our marriage was in shambles. My life was in shambles. I have shared my story and our story numerous times here and through other outlets. The point of this post is not to go through all those details again. The point is to underline something that I have said on repeat through the years in our relationship. I have learned more about the Gospel from my wife than anyone else in my life. She has demonstrated and lived out Gospel principles more faithfully and practically than any person I have ever known.
In 1 Corinthians 13, the Apostle Paul is speaking to a group of confused and disorganized believers who are missing the point of what God in Christ has done and is doing. This passage is like an oasis in a desert of problems. It almost seems out of place. This letter is a letter to correct the things that are wrong in the church and bring these believers back in line with what is true and right. This passage is often used by itself to apply singular truths and we do an injustice to Scripture and to the full impact and depth of the truth that is meant for us here in doing so.
Chapter 13 is the central chapter in Paul's lengthy discussion with this church about Spiritual gifts. In 12 he calls them to the realities and truths regarding how they are received and empowered and how they relate to one another. In 14 he will deal with how they are exercised properly and for the glory and purposes of God. Here in the middle of these lessons, the Apostle reveals the proper motives and power- the "more excellent way" (12:31) in which God desires us to operate.
The message is clear. The spiritually filled and led life is the only life in which the gifts of the Spirit will freely operate. But the health of your spiritual life is not reflective in your gifts but in your fruit. Specifically and uniquely, Spirit Fruit. The first and greatest of which is love. In this context, Paul uses the language of love (agape) and frames for us what it is, and must be to operate in the Spirit.
THAT is what my wife has shown me. That is the fruit she has borne time and time again. As I read the words of Paul in this passage I see that familiar reflection of Christ in my wife that I have so many times before. It's that same Gospel she has demonstrated and that God used to confront and conquer me. This is a Spirit work. This testimony is one of grace and mercy. I glory in Christ because of her and His love in her.
Many songs speak of love in a possessive sense. "Our love" or "We have a love like..." and so on. My wife loves me. I would, and have argued that she loves me more than any woman has ever loved a man. I have even had other people tell me this about her love for me. It is a proven fact (#FightMe). But I also willingly admit, I have given her very few reasons to love me. How can you then justify her love? If you knew what she knows, you would despise me. If you had been through what she has been through, there would already be a Lifetime movie about how you have gotten justice and or revenge on me.
Logic and human understanding of love have no explanation for that. It must be something else altogether. It is. It is a gift. A spiritual gift that comes from someone who has been transformed by the Gospel and is filled with the Spirit of Christ. That is who my Valentine is. So when I read these words I think of her, yes. But the greatest thing I can say about her is that when I think about her, I think about Jesus. I see her patience and I am reminded of how patient He is towards me in spite of my constant failing. I see her kindness and I think of how kind my Savior is towards me in all my grievous acts. In every description, I see the connection and I am thankful. She isn't perfect. Jesus is. They obviously differ there. But I owe it all to Him. All the glory, praise, and honor are His alone. Part of my praise to Him involves thanking Him for the gift of grace that is my beloved, who makes me want to be more like Jesus.
SOLI DEO GLORIO & AB IMO PECTORE
"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.
Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, endures all things." - 1 Corinthians 13:1-7
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